Sunday, October 28, 2012


Its been a long time since I have blogged and probably no one even reads it and thats ok. I just feel the urge to write about Michael and maybe this will be the best place for me to put my words down.

I miss you so much. I never once ever thought that I would have to feel the pain of losing one of my brothers, Mom and Dad yes, but not you or Matt. This last year has been the longest yet the shortest year of my life. Halloween is here and I think about you every day, this is your favorite time of year. There are still so many times I think I cant wait to tell Michael this or show Michael that and then it hits me your not here. I know that I can still talk to you but somehow its not just the same. In my mind I keep going over and over that morning when you left us. You looked so peaceful and even seemed to me that you had a grin on your face. Oh how I miss that grin. I keep remembering how it felt calling 911 knowing that it was too late but still praying and hoping that I wasnt too late. The phone call to Mom and Dad, and then the one to Matt. I never ever want to make a call like that again. The long ride over to tell Brooklyn and the image of her sobbing keeps playing over and over in my mind. Our family is so lost without you. Its so hard because we were like the 3 muskateers where one was the other two werent far behind. Matt and I need you so much to add to the laughter which there really isnt very much of these days. Brooklyn is growing up and needs her daddy so much right now its not fair that you had to leave us so soon. We all go through the daily motions of our life but thats all it is. I worry about Mom, she misses you so much and I cant do anything to make it all better for her. Robert, Bronson, Carter and Shayla miss their Uncle Michael so much. I love you Michael and I am so glad that is the last thing I said to you! Keep watching over us and especially Brooklyn.

Love you!